5. A Discussion On Intent

Nathanial straightened his back while lowering his sword and quickly performed a salute. “Greetings, Captain Morgan, sir.”

“At ease, I’ve never been one to bother with formalities,” the knight replied.

“But following procedures means I have to acknowledge you by saluting—”

“If everyone I met had to salute me each time I saw them, then I would lose my mind.” Captain Morgan lightly chuckled. “The name’s Brian Morgan, Captain of the Hearthfire Knights stationed at this frontier.”

“Nathanial Silverlight.”

“Silverlight? Interesting… I never thought I would see a member of the Silverlight family as a foot soldier.”

Nathanial awkwardly smiled. “Yeah… I’m a bit of a black sheep in the family. Only formed my first aura star in the eighteen years I’ve been alive.”

Brian slowly narrowed his eyes at the remark. He pieced together the situation and understood what had happened while shaking his head in disappointment. “I see… they’ve deemed you a spare. A disposable tool to be cast aside like a broken blade.”

The young man shook his head. “No, that may seem like the case, but I was far more fortunate than most. My brother, Alrick, wanted to take my place, and my father was torn at the reality of the situation.” He met Brian’s eyes. “In the end, I came to the front lines of my own free will.”

“Why?”

“I just wanted to protect my family, and this was the only way I could.” Nathanial’s gaze fell. “I’m not strong by any means, but if I can survive and buy as much time as possible, then my brothers wouldn’t have to come here.”

Brian crossed his arms and nodded. “I am amazed at your valor, but as you are now, you will not survive the next skirmish.”

Nathanial clutched his sword. “I know, but I can’t just do nothing.”

A moment of silence settled between the two. Brian stared at his blade, remembering the oath he took when he entered knighthood, then back at Nathanial. The young man before him had the makings of a knight, but somehow failed to advance in his aura progression.

This meant that the career path was something he had never intended to pursue, or that he lacked the spirit to fulfill the requirements. A predicament that was hard to overcome since aura came from the soul. It relied on one’s own growth, and Nathanial’s was by all means insignificant.

Yet as Brian stared at Nathanial’s bloody palms, he couldn’t help but feel admiration for his cause. His desire was true and his mission noble. There was no greater honor than to live to protect your loved ones. And Brian, who lived to uphold the ideals of his order, couldn’t turn a blind eye to Nathanial’s cause.

“The reason your swing is far from perfect isn’t because of your form or consistency,” Brian said. “It’s because it lacks intent.”

“Intent?” Nathanial frowned. “I’m swinging with the intent to save my family.”

“You claim that… but have you ever found yourself in a situation where it was true?” Brian held onto the scabbard of his sword. “I swore an oath similar to yours, and my intent only appeared when I found myself in an impossible situation.

Nathanial slowly lifted his head and stared at him. “So, what are you saying? That my desire to protect my family isn’t that great?”

Brian shrugged his shoulders before letting go of his sword that was strapped to his belt. “We all have a cause that pushes us to excel; perhaps yours is misplaced or the fuel for the flames isn’t enough. You’ve awakened your first star, but what was it that truly manifested your power?”

Not a word escaped Nathanial’s lips. He gently dragged one foot across the packed dirt while trying to remember what caused his aura to awaken. Aura will always be a complex matter. There were countless different variations of how one awakens it; some would even say it’s a calling of one’s soul.

So what am I doing wrong?

Nathanial stared at his bloody palms. He felt the searing pain pulse through his limbs, and with it a newfound understanding of what he needed to do. Brian was far more experienced with aura than he was. He may have been from a noble family, but they were scholars by trade and diplomats by heart.

Every fiber of his being wanted to protect his family.

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His father, as stern as he was—never forced them to do something that his children didn’t want. If it wasn’t for the war, Nathanial would still be at home, helping with the territory’s record keeping. Even his brothers were kind and caring, not willing to sacrifice one of their own and always looking out for each other.

But if he died here… then they would be next.

And how could he let that happen?

When the enemy footman knocked him down on the battlefield, a part of him subconsciously gave up. Living to protect his family needed more than just standing in front. He knew he needed to survive, but how? How could he when he came face to face with his limits already?

“Your own self-doubt will be the death of you,” Brian commented. He glanced over at the other knights who were resting nearby. Some waved to him while others grinned. “There’s a saying that strength comes from within. Some would say it’s determination, but in reality, it is conviction.”