Threads 276-Grudges 7

Ling Qi’s head snapped up, eyes widening in surprise. “But…”

“I was not there. You are important, but you are not my only business,” Shu Yue explained, righting the angle of their head. There was a faint scraping sound like bone on a carapace.

That… made sense. “Of course. I should not let myself come to rely too much on the idea of a safety net.”

“It is a good lesson.” Shu Yue cracked a toothless smile, an inky black crescent on their pale face. “Elders always come to fail their juniors. Rely on those who stand beside you, not behind.”

“Ling Qi’s doing just fine,” Sixiang interrupted dismissively. To Ling Qi, they reminded, “You didn’t even think about spooky here being around till after. Fobbing responsibility off on another never crossed your mind at the time.”

Ling Qi dipped her head, taking the muse’s chiding in mind. It was true that the idea of Shu Yue being available to assist had only come in the uncertainty after the attack when she had time to sit and let her mind spin.

Shu Yue inclined their head. “Regardless, I feel that your encounter will have given you some insights into my lesson.”

Ling Qi turned to fully face her teacher. “And what exactly is your Eye of Grudges art, Shu Yue? You have not explained yet.”

They hummed, their hunched back and their legs straightening until they stood at their full height. Droplets of water clung to their fingertips as they fell to their sides. “The Eye of Grudges is an art of understanding people and the ties that bind them. Its techniques will allow you to insert yourself behind another’s eyes and immerse yourself in their woes.”

“That sounds very intrusive,” Ling Qi said cautiously.

“For you, it would be.” Shu Yue rubbed their chin thoughtfully. “When I was young, I found it easy to become another. You cannot intrude or invade if there is no self to shove theirs aside.”

“Why is everything you say so ominous?” Sixiang asked flatly.

Shu Yue ignored them. “You understand, Ling Qi, the truth of us. Press us, starve us, isolate us, and we become animals, beasts of panic and fear and hate. Even the most virtuous of men, if pressed hard enough, will find their humanity peeling away like a thin skin on a fruit. I do not judge this. It simply is. Perhaps there is one in a million or one in ten million who truly cannot break, but this is not a standard mortals can be held to, nor indeed, most who cultivate.”

“The point of a society—a community—is to keep people out of that state.”

“As you like. My Eyes see the splintered threads of pain and hurt. They see fear and the chains of resentment it forges. Tell me true, are there none who you hate?”

“I don’t have time to hold grudges,” Ling Qi responded automatically. “But…”

“Some remain all the same,” Shu Yue finished. “Humans remember hurts more strongly than help, pain more clearly than pleasure, and failure more starkly than success.”

“People don’t have to be like that though.”

“It is good to strive. Those who wallow can only bring ruin.” Shu Yue tapped their fingers together thoughtfully as they strode onto the shore. “Nonetheless, to understand a person, you must understand their grudges. You cannot judge how a person will act without their baser urges. You have seen an example now of a truly deep grudge.”

Ling Qi grimaced. “You’re talking about the traitor. How in the world can he…?” She gritted her teeth.

That news had its own uproar, a simmering rage that spread with the communication. The Sect was furious. With that knowledge, the failure of the wards in the advance base underground and the many deaths it had caused were laid in a new light.

If Yan Renshu ever stood openly on the surface again, she had no doubt his life was forfeit.

“I have not observed him, only memories of him,” Shu Yue replied clinically. “But there is a type of man for whom pride is more precious than their own heart’s blood. Indeed, they are very common, if not usually so severe in their transgression. It is this that I aim to teach you.”

Ling Qi held back a retort that she didn’t want to understand a mind that would think that way. But she understood that even if she didn’t want to, she had to learn.

“You cannot understand people without understanding their fears, their resentments, and their hates,” Shu Yue said, putting it into bland but undeniable words. “Or succinctly, their grudges.”

The air in the clearing stilled, the soft sounds of nature dying away before a black pressure that pressed down on Ling Qi from all sides. It vanished quickly enough, and Sixiang flipped themselves upright to glare at Shu Yue. The elder cultivator looked back at them without expression.

“It’s fine, Sixiang. I know what being consumed by that looks like. It’s no different from scouting an enemy to learn how they work.”

“It is not only your enemies’ grudges that you will need to look upon,” Shu Yue interjected.

“Okay, yes,” Ling Qi agreed reluctantly. It still felt… bad.

Shu Yue nodded, tilting their head back to observe the crystals glittering on the roof of the cavern. “Good. Let us begin then. Yan Renshu, what is his drive? His grudge?”

Ling Qi nearly said something pithy, but she understood where Shu Yue was going with this. It wasn’t about the obvious surface answer. It was about digging down into the ugly, tangled roots. So she frowned and thought of everything she had ever learned about the vile little toad.

His family were perpetual underachievers, ever just below the mark for gaining nobility. He was hostile to them as well, going by his interaction with his uncle. In his first year at the Sect, he so offended a noble scion that they inflicted an outright crippling injury on him.

Stolen novel; please report.

He resented the mighty and had contempt for the weak. He had no qualms about tricking and exploiting others into false and ruinous contracts. He always seemed to feel like he was owed. She remembered that once, he had even implied that by trying to frame her and drive her away from her noble friends that he was doing her a favor.

Yan Renshu thought himself very smart, smarter than everything else. He seemed to have very little ability to make uncoerced connections.