B1 Chapter 9: Thump

“All right, you lot, sit down! Food’s coming,” Bruno shouted across the saloon.

Millie looked around and swore. “Shit. We only saved one seat. Pat’s already sleeping, though, so we can probably just tell him to go home.” She cupped her hands around her mouth. “Hey, Pat! You’re drunk! Get your ass out of the seat! We need it!”

Her husband, Boris, gently rocked a bald human man awake.

To his surprise, Modivar recognized him. It was the woodcutter he had tried to bargain with the other day.

The man stirred and slapped Boris’s hand away. “Stop that. I’m trying to take a nap here, you bastards. Let me sleep.”

“Pat, you’re drunk, dumbass,” Millie said. “I said get out. We need the spot.”

Pat squinted at her. “Why do you need a spot? Isn’t there already a spot for Bella? I’m going back to bed. Wake me in the morning. I gotta get up for…”

Boris glanced at Millie. “Do I get it if I thump him one?”

“Yeah, you’ll get it. Don’t worry,” Millie cut him off. “Just give him a little thrashing. If you don’t mind.”

Boris cracked his knuckles and drew back his fist.

“Please, please, it’s no bother,” Modivar said quickly, stepping forward. “I can sit on a barrel, or something. Just let the man sleep. I don’t need you to thrash somebody for the likes of me. You barely know me. You have to live with that man.”

Millie waved him off. “We don’t even like him. He’s just there. It really is no bother. He probably deserves it. Did he ever pay you back, Sandy?”

Sandy, a woman near the hearth, nodded. “Oh, yeah. With interest.”

Millie blinked. “Well, damn. I guess we shouldn’t thrash him, then.”

“Ah, you bitches,” Pat muttered as he pushed himself upright. “If you needed the chair that badly, fuck it. I’m going home. But don’t ask me for any lumber for nothing… If I remember this conversation. Whatever. I’m outta here.”

He stumbled to his feet and pointed lazily at Modivar. “Hey, new guy. Thanks for not getting me punched in the face. That generally sucks. Come by, and I’ll give you that lumber you were asking for. If I remember. And if your face doesn’t bother me as much as it did the last time I saw you.”

He draped an arm over Modivar’s shoulders for a moment and leaned close. “Watch out for Bella. She’s crazy.”

Then, he staggered toward the door. He slipped twice in the mud outside, but he didn’t seem bothered by it.

“Shouldn’t somebody make sure he gets home?” Modivar asked.

“He’s fine,” Belladonna replied. “Honestly, that’s the most sober I’ve seen him in months. He’s going to have a good day tomorrow.”

The three gnomes, Millie, Modivar, and Belladonna found their seats. Millie very deliberately shoved Boris toward the corner so that Belladonna and Modivar ended up sitting next to each other.

Gwendolyn was deep into the barrel.

The horse had apparently taken a liking to whatever Bruno was serving, and he seemed impressed with her fortitude.

“You drink like a horse,” Bruno said, then paused. “Well… I guess that actually makes a lot of sense.” He leaned on the bar and nodded at her. “This is the good stuff. No one else in this shithole of a village can keep it down nearly as long as you have. So good on you. Your drinks are on me. You’re a horse of fine taste.”

Gwendolyn belched and swayed slightly.

Bruno chuckled.

The room went quiet.

Everyone except Modivar turned slowly and stared at Bruno.

Millie narrowed her eyes. “Did he just laugh?”

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“I think he did,” Belladonna said. “Should we be worried?”

Someone near the back shouted, “I didn’t know he could do that! In twenty-something years of knowing him, I don’t think I’ve ever seen him smile, let alone laugh. The world is ending!”

Bruno stopped smiling and straightened up. “Just because you all suck at conversation does not mean I have no emotions,” he said. He pointed at Gwendolyn. “This horse is funny. You all can suck it.”

Millie put both her hands on her cheeks and smiled, looking at Modivar and Belladonna. Then, trying to be surreptitious, she slipped her hand under the table. She might have succeeded, if not for Boris. Boris’s eyes went wide as Millie’s shoulders moved up and down.

Modivar tried not to stare.

“So, Modivar,” Millie said, “what brings you to this shithole of a village?”

“I’m trying to look the other direction,” Modivar said. “I’m trying to get away from it all. That’s my problem. I’m just trying to get away.”