Chapter 168: Defeating Lord Bakton

Even in defeat, William Oh finds a way to achieve a more punishing victory.

• Jason Salazar

Two weeks went by in a maelstrom of punishment.

“I’m not sure I’m getting this,” Will said, using a brush and soapy water to scour dirt and bits of the arena wall out of his front before the priestesses closed it back up. “I’m not sure I’m gonna get this.”

I think my tolerance for pain has come disturbingly far in the last year, Will thought, rinsing and re-dipping the bloody brush in soapy water and starting on the next shrapnel-filled scrape.

It was a very strange sensation, fighting Bakton, especially on this Floor. Will was so much stronger than Sammohan that he could effectively overwhelm the man with raw speed and power, but against Bakton it was like he was just…buying time.

Walking an infinite tightrope until he eventually fell off. There was no winning, only delaying defeat. Kind of like the sin amalgam, actually.

Even if Will started off strong, it would eventually unravel. How? Will couldn’t quite grasp it.

Bakton wasn’t looking for Will to literally tell him a funny joke, Will found that out quickly. The hard way. Bakton was looking for Will to perform an action in combat that made him laugh.

Naturally, Will had assumed pratfalls would be the solution but those always ended in pain. Bakton didn’t seem to have a sense of humor about those, and they usually ended in kicks while he was down.

Will suppressed a sharp inhale as Ria plucked a shard of rock out of his back. Anna wasn’t in attendance, because she didn’t really have the stomach for anything bloodier than a kissable boo-boo.

“Almost done back there?” He asked, offering the scrub-brush.

“Almost.” Ria said, her tongue sticking out a bit as she concentrated.

“Will, I’ve been watching you get picked apart for two weeks,” Loth said, her bugs assisting with Will’s first aid.

“…And you’ve been getting better and better at fighting, but you still keep losing. After stewing on it for a few days, I don’t think the issue is with fighting, but perhaps your understanding of comedy.

“How so?” Will asked.

“What is comedy?” Loth asked.

“When you say or do something funny.” Will said with a shrug.

“Why is it funny?” Loth asked.

Will stared into the distance.

“…Huh. Never really thought about it. It’s just…funny.”

“Will, there are several different breeds of comedy. We’re going to narrow our focus down to a couple.”

“Shoot,” Will said, wincing as another shard came out of his back.

“Observational humor is when the comedian highlights a truth of their life and shares it with the audience, often through a lens that shares the comedian’s perspective, the humor of which is derived from the shared experience of the audience.”

“…How would that apply to fighting Bakton?” Will asked.

“I don’t know.” Loth said with a shrug. “Humor, when boiled down to its most basic, is about shared experiences, but also defying expectations. Most structured jokes build an expectation in their audience based on shared experiences, then defy the expectations in a novel way.

The gap between the expectation and the punchline is where humor lives. Similarly, the harmony between a comedian’s observations and those of their audience are where the humor lives.

Build expectation, then undercut it.” Loth said. “Or build on shared experiences. The best comedians do both at the same time.”

“…How do you know so much about comedians?” Will asked.

“Akul night-life.” Loth said.

Will had questions, but he didn’t pursue them in favor of continuing their current discussion.

“Undercut expectations. In combat that would be…Like…a feint?” Will asked.

Loth snapped her fingers, and pointed a claw at Will.

A feint that is also a joke that highlights a shared experience between both of us? Will thought. How does Bakton expect me to do something like that? First thing I’d have to do Is understand what shared experiences we have. Perhaps if I…

“…Huh.” Was the only sound Will made, his eyes staring into the distance as he retreated into his thoughts.

“I see you’ve got something.” Loth said.

“…Maybe.” Will said. “I think – OW!”

“That’s a big one,” Bee mused, looking over Ria’s shoulder as the Tangled plucked a thumb-sized shard of magically reinforced stone out of Will’s skin.

“Okay, hand me the brush,” Ria said, sliding the soap and rinse bucket over to her side.

Will acquiesced, then braced himself for a brutal scrubbing as his wounds were cleaned out.

“Here’s your…barrels,” a small team of Anna started cheerfully, dropping off the barrels dated two weeks ago. The girls got an eyeful of Will’s mangled body and and turned green, hustling back to the other side of the partition.

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“isn’t she seeing what you’re seeing all the time?” Will asked through gritted teeth as Ria scrubbed the dirt out of his wounds.

“We’re not actively sharing everything constantly. It’s like having your eyes closed. Even with closed eyes, you can distinguish light and dark and maybe a bit of movement. With a thought we can open our eyes to each other’s experiences, but we generally don’t intrude on each other’s privacy without reason.” Ria said. “More light here.”

Loth’s torchbugs moved to accommodate while Will fetched the first barrel with Phantom Hand, grabbing his two Greater Healing Potions and storing them before moving on to the rings.

Will popped open the first Ring of Resistance Barrel and plucked the simple gold band out of the depleted dust, inspecting it.

Ring of Resistance

+24 Resistance

Will checked the next two rings, getting 20 and 18 for them, because Will had used most of the good Resistance relics on the first one.

All but the best one.

Will had an unmodified ring with a Resistance boost of 11. If this worked, he could-

“Arms up,” Ria said, prompting Will to raise his arms.

A moment later a bucket of clean water was dumped over his head, washing away all the blood and soap.

“Hmmm.” Ria gave Will’s wounds a critical once-over before nodding. “Looks clean enough. I’ll fetch the healers.”

“Thanks.” Will nodded as Ria left.

In a minute, the incidental wounds from his sparring with Bakton were faint scars that would fade to nothing in a matter of days thanks to Aspect of the Immortal Serpent.

Once Will was allowed to put his clothes back on, he immediately grabbed his bolt cutters and ashed the three Resistance rings into a clean barrel, dropping in the +11 ring he’d been saving for the occasion. If it worked, Will should get a ring with a Resistance bonus somewhere around +45, and would immediately slot it in Phantom Hand and set about making Brianna a Focus ring.