Ch20 Snack Run

 

I experimented with Human.exe for the rest of the night, the rat/Nessie providing the resources for the experiments. My results were… mixed. On the one hand, Human.exe acted just like any other program I stored in memory. I could move it from inorganic memory to organic memory and back again, I could run an instance of it on appropriate hardware, and most surprisingly of all, I could create multiple backup copies of the program and delete them. The only thing I couldn’t do was actually open up the code to look at its “guts” which was quite frustrating.

 

One interesting fact I did learn was that I can actually make two brains and run two separate instances of Human.exe at the same time… for about sixty seconds. Then the thought process kernels diverge too far, and the micro units in the brains get confused about who they actually belong to and self-destruct rather spectacularly, which was an interesting (if useless) result. The first time I tried it the micro units broke down so quickly that the two brains actually combusted due to the chemical energy released. I only tried the experiment a few more times after that, brains are resource intensive.

 

The Human.exe problem was proving to be unsolvable for now. Simply not using Human.exe was not an option, so the next step was mitigation. If I couldn’t solve the problem I could mitigate its effects, and for that I need more resources: fuel, materials, knowledge, weapons, allies.

 

Fuel was not a problem, human food was loaded with sugar, oils, and fats for energy, easily the best fuel source available.

 

Nutrients and complex organic compounds were also not a problem. While human food didn’t provide everything, what it didn’t have I could make myself using micro units. Technically hunting for fresh meat was the best source of nutrients, but it definitely wasn’t safer. The rats were becoming more aggressive (Odd Summer’s influence?), and hunting humans was not an option. So far I had killed only five humans, all of them attacking me first, and yet the vigilante had still taken offense. What would happen if I started actively hunting humans I could only imagine.

 

My own ignorance was a problem. Most of my more dangerous fights were due to stumbling upon something dangerous I hadn’t known to watch out for. Hopefully having a phone to research with would help with that.

 

I needed more weapons, something I was hoping the bioweapon corpse would help me with, but which so far had proven to be a disappointment. There were a few interesting inorganic compounds (preservatives?), and I found some muscle tissue design that was more efficient than what I had been using so far…

Estimated .093% increased efficiency.

 

…but it wasn’t really much to speak of. I was trying to reserve judgement of this supposed bioweapon as it did have the markings of a trial run, too many redundant organs and lots of errors in the circulatory system, but so far I hadn’t learned anything I couldn’t have learned by just eating a Nessie. Maybe it was just a test of the mobile platform?

 

Bleh.

 

Beep

 

My mask beeped. I checked it and was immediately cheered up. While the bioweapon was a disappointment, Hellion’s Henchmen were constantly rewarding to work with. The displayed message was from Socket, telling me my suit was ready for testing and that I should get down to the garage “pronto.” I quickly went about dissolving the remnants of the rat/Nessie and getting my disguise back in order, then I climbed to the entrance.

 

I lifted the manhole cover carefully, it was still early morning but the sewer entrance was on the sidewalk, so I needed to make sure the area was relatively clear. Once I climbed out, and the manhole was back in place, I headed north following my phone’s map.

 

The sun was just cresting over the tops of the buildings. I had learned last night the full details of the sun and ‘space’. The sheer distances and scale involved… terrifying. But apparently it couldn’t hurt me, so I ignored it.

 

Despite the early hour the human traffic was already increasing rapidly, so I stuck to the sidewalks this time around. It seems there was indeed some logic to the nighttime curfew. Unlike last night I only saw one unusual occurrence; two police cars chasing a third civilian car down the road, this one on fire. The humans around me stopped to watch, but otherwise ignored it, so I paid it no further attention.

 

I did find a Puzzle’s Pretzel vendor though, so I was finally able to buy myself one. Seems they stuff them with a melted cheese substitute, which was quite tasty.

 

Once I got to Ashwood St. I headed towards the gym that Mikey used since it was closer than the jacket store base entrance, and placed my mask on to enter the elevator. This phone made finding a good route so much easier. Oddly though, once I was actually inside the elevator the GPS began acting weirdly. It showed me continuing to move north when I knew I should be traveling down Ashwood St. I’d ask Socket about it later.

 

The elevator dropped me off in the usual hallway and I made my way down to the garage, greeting some of the other minions who were already up. Interestingly I noticed that several minions had fallen asleep in the main room used for the dinner party yesterday, one among them being Pebbles. It was a clever idea to sleep in the base, it was definitely safer than most places, however I preferred my tunnel by Maggie’s diner. I liked the fact that I could seal both the top and bottom with the tinker made hatches, and that it opened into an empty alley. The tunnel leading to Nicole’s den had definitely felt more vulnerable to rest in.

 

I reached the garage and found Socket in his normal area. He was slumped over one of his worktables, and seemed rather tired.

 

“Good morning Socket.”

Socket raised his head from the table. “Tofu. Bout time lad! What were ye doing? Sniffin daisies?”

“I was-”

“Yes yes, here, try on the damn suit before I have a stroke,” and he threw a suit to me that seemed much like the ones I had tried yesterday. It was a dull black and gray, with a distinct spiraling pattern wrapping around the limbs.

 

I used one of the curtained off areas to try on the suit. It fit rather well over my normal disguise once I dissolved my fake clothing, but it seemed very similar to the suits I had tried before, one single piece that extended to my wrists and ankles, with only a strange toothless zipper to make entry easier. The full covering was a problem despite its stretchiness.

 

“Well come on lad. Test er out,” said Socket as I exited the curtain.

 

I was confused, but I did what he said and stretched out one of my arms. The suit was indeed flexible, but when my arm expanded too far the sleeve ripped down its length! No, wait, it split on purpose? Where once it was a tube like any other sleeve it had split along the pattern and now spiraled down my arm until it wrapped around my wrist . Then when I retracted my arm the suit went with it, and the split closed up leaving only an intact sleeve and spiral pattern behind. This was perfect! I could shift my limbs freely this way without exposing my vitals to gunfire!

 

“Ha, impressed ay’? You didn’t doubt ol’ Socket did you?”

“I’m sorry I doubted you Socket. This suit is perfect.”

“Bah, I’m just glad it’s done, maybe now I can get some shuteye.” He said it gruffly but he was grinning.

“You haven’t slept? Why?”

“Ah, just the ol’ tinker twitch. The material I use for the suits is good fer bullets, an’ fireproof o’ course, but it don’t stretch the way you need it to, had to redo the formula. An’ the damn sleeves I’ve never had to make that way before, twitch wouldn’t let it go before I solved it. The legs’ll split too by the by.”

 

I locked my leg bones into the new position I had developed while jumping buildings, then gave one a test kick. The suit leggings split to allow for the odd configuration, not hindering the force of the kick and just clinging to the leg until I snapped it back. Then when I folded the leg bones back into a normal disguise configuration the leggings sealed again. It was impossible to tell that they hadn’t always been a solid piece.

 

“Thank you Socket. I owe you one.”

“Bah, no ya don’t. It’s me job. Here, just pass Gregor’s suit to him when he comes down, I’m gonna go git me some shuteye,” and he passed me a folded suit that was quite a bit larger and thicker than mine before heading out a side passage.

 

I spent a while trying out the suit, it really was a great design. I also found out that the torso could split in several places around the sides and middle to allow for extra limbs, though not as drastically as the sleeves and leggings. Overall the suit was quite permeable to allow for my shifting, but while I was in my most human shape the suit would provide coverage for everything except my hands and feet, the neckline even met snugly with my mask.

 

I really liked it. Now I just needed to figure out how to never take it off. It wasn’t good to casually wear it around as it was quite obviously a powered minion suit. Maybe I could grow a layer of flesh to cover it up with fake clothes? Anchoring the skin layer properly would be somewhat awkward though… a hard hit might sever it off and make it dissolve… plus shifting it each time I needed to change was rather wasteful…maybe I should just buy some normal clothes?

You could be reading stolen content. Head to Royal Road for the genuine story.

 

I was pondering what to do when Gregor finally showed up. He was walking with Pebbles and two other minions in black masks I recognized as Fred and Brilla, members of team three. Pebbles was laughing and talking loudly to Gregor, while Fred and Brilla clutched their heads and flinched every time Pebble’s booming laugh came forth. After the third time Brilla elbowed him in the ribs, but it seemed to hurt her elbow more than it affected Pebbles. They made their way over to me.

 

“Morning Tofu,” said Gregor, “Have you seen Socket? Sent me a message saying I should come in and try my suit.”

“Good morning, Socket went to get some sleep, but he told me to give you this,” and I handed him the bundled suit.

“Ha, with Socket Christmas always comes early,” said Pebbles. “Hey Tofu, I was offering to show Gregor west Ashwood proper, you in?”

“In what?”

“For some fun, what else! We’ll have to do a little grunt work, but I guarantee you’ll get to test yer new toy there.”

 

Oh! A weapons test with allies around. That would be nice.

 

“I’ll go.”

“HA! That’s the spirit!” Fred and Brilla flinched, and Brilla slapped the back of his helmet this time. “Ach, not my fault you two can’t drink right.”

 

Gregor tested his suit while Pebbles went to clear the mission. For my part I continued testing my range of movement in the suit. I wanted to make sure I had all the splitting points memorized so I could thrust a knife through without poking or tearing a hole in my own suit. Once Gregor was done changing he also tested his suit with stretches that Adder had taught us, and we chatted about the company dinner from yesterday.

 

“Yeah, I wasn’t sure about this whole minion business at first, but I’m definitely eating a lot better,” said Gregor.

“Indeed, the Kobe beef was quite delicious.”

“Told ya.”

 

After a little while Pebbles came back, and waved us over to him.

 

“Alright, I got us cleared to go, but Sandra said if I’m taking you two then we might as well grab Ifrit and make it a real training run. We’ll wait for her and then take off.”

 

He led us to one of the larger vans, and while Pebbles told us an ‘anecdote’ of one time he went to W15, Ifrit showed up and walked quickly to reach us.

 

“Hey there princess, you ready to rumble?” said Pebbles.