TWO HUNDRED SIXTY-FOUR: Snow VI

264

******

Esh-erdi and Lind-otta responded to Alden’s text with a joint video call. They were together in a place that wasn’t Anesidora. It was night, and they stood on a wide, painted staircase that climbed up toward a tall rock formation. What Alden could see of it was mostly a dark shape partially covered with darker vegetation, towering behind the two knights.

There were no other people. Despite the landscape being foreign, he thought they were still on Earth. There was something in the construction of the stairs and in the shape and color of the lights along the edges. Something about the sounds of the night around them.

The knights were both looking at him with smiles, but he felt like he was intruding. And he couldn’t even apologize for it out loud.

[Sorry to bother you when you’re traveling together,] he messaged, suddenly very aware of how his own surroundings must look.

Beside him, Servin-ith was reaching for a cup of cocoa and thanking the Shaper. Lute had a cotton candy pig that had lost so much altitude it was basically a hat. The wizard who’d bought the hot dogs was now reading about hot dogs on the internet and delivering random facts about them to the others in the back of their group. And Bash-nor was being loud again—just a jocular, friendly guy who was ever so close to the Avowed here, offering the Shaper tips for improvement.

[I can handle this myself actually,] Alden wrote. [You two have fun.]

“It looks like you’re having your own kind of fun. How could Drusi have neglected to tell me you were on tour with Grand Senator Servin-ith and that decent wizard who’s illusioned himself to look like Bash-nor? We should punish her, Lind.”

“Being our votary is punishment all too often,” Lind-otta said. “I’m sure she’d rather be shut away in a closet right now. She’s there, Alden. We loaned her to Servin-ith for additional protection and assistance.”

“And so that she could tell us if anything interesting happened.” Esh-erdi shook his head. “She’s doing a terrible job.”

Alden looked around the market. He saw absolutely no sign of the votary.

“What are you doing with that group?” Esh-erdi asked.

[I’m really fine. Especially if Drusi-otta is here. I’ll just send a message to her.]

“What are you going to send in the message to her? Tell me first.”

Alden started to sigh but aborted the noisy exhale halfway through because he didn’t want Servin-ith and Bash-nor to think he was bored. Or think he was on a call with the knights, asking for advice about how to deal with them.

Better text it all quick.

[Zeridee suggested I introduce myself to the Grand Senator,] he explained, taking a cup of artificial wevvi from the Shaper since it was being held out to him. [I didn’t want to, but she made it sound like it was important. Grand Senator Servin-ith seems to like me, and Ambassador Bash-nor is annoyed I’m here. My friend Lute and I have noticed that he’s trying to control the senator’s trip so that she only meets with Avowed who admire him. For some reason, she was going along with that, so we’re suggesting she should go to the gingerbread village next. After that, we could point her somewhere else, just so that Bash-nor isn’t managing everything.]

[I tried to figure out what Zeridee wanted, and I think she might want the ambassador to be fired. She must have thought I could help with that. I just mentioned almost drowning. He was trying to say all my trauma was caused by Ro-den and not the incident with the flyer, so I brought that up. Is this safe? You told me not to worry about him, but then this happened. I could try to do some more to influence the Grand Senator, or after the gingerbread village, Lute and I could find an excuse to leave the group if that’s better.]

Neither of the knights responded immediately.

“I hear you,” said Esh-erdi, his tone turning almost polite. “I hear that you are helping Zeridee-und’h by wading, with such sudden eagerness, into the political sea you believe she is pointing you toward…and you are now checking with me to see if the water is safe before you go deeper…”

Lind-otta, usually so poised, started cackling. Her voice echoed around them.

“…it’s good. I wanted you to trust me with your questions,” said Esh-erdi, trying to cover Lind-otta’s mouth with a hand and missing as she took a seat on the staircase, her shoulders rising and falling with mirth. “Ignore my magnificent Lind. She’s sharing her voice with the creatures of the Malaysian near-dawn, not laughing at you.”

“I’m really not laughing at him.”

Alden barely caught the fact that they were in Malaysia. Their reactions were making him sweat.

[Did I get this wrong?]

“Wait. I’m asking for a report from Drusi-otta now,” Esh-erdi said. “She’s asleep at that human festival, isn’t she?”

[I can fix it. Maybe. Shit.] Alden mental texted his thoughts by mistake.

“Don’t do anything. Nothing’s broken. Definitely don’t shit.”

“No, I meant I—”

Servin-ith turned at the sound of Alden’s voice. His view of her face was partially obscured by the video window that showed the knights.

“Did you want something other than the wevvi, dear?” she asked.

“Oh, no!” he said. “I was talking to…um…”

He needed to sound like he’d been paying attention to the people around him, but he hadn’t caught most of what had been said in the past minute. His options were limited.

“I was just commenting on the hot dog conversation going on back there. You know how your homeland is famous for mountain glass? Chicago is famous for hot dogs, so I have a lot to say about them. Too much. Let me tell you about they can be improved with celery salt.”

Am I really talking about this?

I had the beginnings of a plan, and now I have celery salt?

Ro-den once told me that pretending to be stupid was a great way to manipulate wizards. Maybe this is good. Bash-nor will never suspect someone with a celery salt obsession was trying to plot against him.

Lute was looking at Alden with confusion.

Lind-otta had stopped laughing, but she was still grinning.

Esh-erdi was brightening at whatever he was hearing from Drusi-otta.

Zeridee’s face, visible through the gap between two other Artonans, was tense. Like she was preparing to run away. Or beat up the ambassador. Or beat Alden to shut him up.

Bash-nor had been forced to fall silent and delay whatever story he’d been about to share while the Grand Senator supplied Alden with Artonan words that might help him explain the flavor of celery to his audience.

At least I’m making him suffer, too.

[Lute: Celery? No elf bingo? More vegetables.]

“On campus, people associate Alden with radishes,” Lute said. Apparently, he was under the impression that this was now the official direction for their Bash-nor attack scheme.

So many people are hearing this, thought Alden. How do I make it stop?

“A root crop? Why is that?” Servin-ith asked Lute.

Lute launched into a dramatic version of the tale about Hazel and the falling radishes. It gave Alden time to catch his breath, and it worked out better than he deserved. Lute was somehow making Alden dropping crudités sound like proof of his gentility. Like the Velras at that party had been such ogres that all decent attendees should have been shocked into losing control of their vegetables.

Lind-otta appeared to be listening to the story intently.

And while Lute was entertaining everyone, Esh-erdi had time to turn back into his usual self and respond to Alden’s questions.

“I understand everything now,” he said cheerfully. “Except for your decision to speak of salt. Here is your introduction to the sea. I will go quickly, so pay attention. Bash-nor is one of Grand Senator Servin-ith’s strong supporters and allies. They agree on how certain things should be done, but they don’t agree on why they should be done that way. And Servin-ith has grown heavy-seated in recent years.”

Alden frowned as he tried to make out what that meant. Esh-erdi guessed what he was struggling with.

“Heavy in her seat. As though she can’t be moved. Her popularity is so high that her position on the Grand Senate should endure some <<setbacks>>. This has been a good situation for Bash-nor because his connection to Servin-ith has helped him to elevate himself. But at the moment, it’s a problem for him. Servin-ith is too powerful to truly need him, and he has now pricked her morals with the needle of <<a plant that causes prolonged skin irritation>>.

“She reviewed all the speeches he delivered to your people during and after the recent disaster and found them disappointing. This wouldn’t have been enough to cause a rift in their relationship, I think, but there are other needles. The und’h family was angry to learn that Zeridee had been left to look after you on her own that night. They have allies who get along with Servin-ith, and those allies have likely encouraged Servin-ith to come take a closer look at whether or not Bash-nor has been a proper ambassador.”

[I understand,] said Alden.

“Then I’ll keep going. I’m unsure if Servin-ith feels responsibility toward Zeridee-und’h. She would if Zeridee were a normal member of the ordinary class, but Zeridee isn’t. However, Servin-ith does treasure her own role as a protector of non-wizards…perhaps in a way that is annoying. Drusi says that she is treating you too much like a young child, and that you’ve noticed.”

She really is watching us, thought Alden. [Drusi-otta is right.]

“In recent days,” said Esh-erdi, “Bash-nor has begun to speak as if he would like to remain the ambassador here for longer. This is a new goal of his. He probably intends to work hard and leave wearing the honor of having overseen Anesidora’s healing instead of being one whose time of service is trouble-stained.”

Alden found himself glancing at Bash-nor in surprise. [Would he actually do good if he got the job again?]

“Perhaps. But why rely on the possibility of Bash-nor becoming a more excellent ambassador when other wizards who have already proven their excellence are available to take his place? Because of what’s happened, a former ambassador—one who was particularly well-liked by Anesidorans—may be <<cajoled>> into serving again. I’ve made some efforts to encourage that outcome. There are many places in this universe where Bash-nor can do good if he wants. Should he be allowed to spend more time polishing his character on millions of Avowed instead?”

[No. He shouldn’t.]

“It seems the daughter of the und’h family agrees with you. Although, based on what Drusi says and that funny expression on Zeridee’s face, she only wanted you to be nice to the senator and endear yourself. I don’t think she meant for you to understand her deeper intentions and start complaining about Bash-nor to Servin-ith.”

Alden pretended to savor his wevvi and flicked his gaze over to take a peek at Zeridee. [She just told me to be myself and be honest if the senator asked questions. But I was trying to figure out why she wanted me to be around Bash-nor when the last thing she said about him was that I should avoid him. And especially avoid annoying him.]

“Zeridee may have intended to say things more directly to the Grand Senator after you’d sweetened her mood and left,” Lind-otta said. “So that Bash-nor’s anger would fall on her, not you.”

Esh-erdi frowned. “That does sound like an idea she might have if Servin-ith is showing signs of giving into Bash-nor instead of getting rid of him. Zeridee is not as fond of her own wellbeing as she should be….Lind, do you think…?”

“All right, my young dears,” Servin-ith said, “what were you two telling me about a village made of bread?”

Lute had run out of story, and the senator had run out of questions about the story. Lute and Alden now stood on either side of her. Bash-nor was beside Lute, being forced to look around the pig.

“What is that thing on your friend’s head?” Esh-erdi asked. “Did you put it there to bother Bash-nor?”

“I believe they’ve already seen the gingerbread village, so they probably wouldn’t like to go there again. There is a wonderful woman you have to meet, Servin-ith,” the ambassador was saying. “Someone who can tell you about work I did last year for…”

Prioritize, thought Alden, as the number of inputs threatened to overwhelm him. I only have one stream of thought to work with, so I prioritize. Number One: stay a friendly, innocent Rabbit for Servin-ith. I have no secrets that would make her want to remove me from Earth.

He couldn’t forget that comment about how not all magic was meant for sharing with humans.

“The gingerbread village is great, though!” he said. “Lute says it’s been here for years, and gingerbread is a Christmas tradition in lots of places on Earth. If you’d like to do something else, there’s also a woman selling gloves and mittens back that way. She’s so caring. She invites young people from intake to her home for holiday meals. Intake is the place where new Avowed from other countries live when we first come to Anesidora. Or there’s also…”

I can’t do it. I can’t say it. No. I can.

“Elf bingo,” said Alden, more or less straight-faced, “which is a game Lute is currently playing.”

Unauthorized duplication: this narrative has been taken without consent. Report sightings.

Lute whipped out his bingo card. “I only need the silver elf to win.”

“Or,” said Alden, “if you’re thinking of leaving the market to see more of the city, there’s this amazing shop not far from here that sells Wrightwork masks. They have one that you’d—”

“I think the Grand Senator would love to see the gingerbread village. I know I would. Especially if you two are so fond of it.” Bash-nor’s voice had turned so bubbly Alden wasn’t sure what to make of it.

“He didn’t like that last suggestion at all,” said Lind-otta, tilting her head.

“Yes, he’s panicked about it.” Esh-erdi looked curious.

[He is? About the mask store?] Alden sent.