Chapter Five – As Per My Next Email

Chapter Five – As Per My Next Email

“This new legislation will make it impossible for people to have multiple citizenships… no, I will not be taking questions… no, my wife doesn’t have four citizenships, she has three. Hmm? No, here are exceptions to the law. Look, it’s all in the bill. I’m done answering questions. Thank you.”

–Senator Ima Badguy, press conference, 2027

***

“You’ll be coming, right?” I asked.

Delilah gave me a look, and while she was very good at keeping a flat, unemotional expression on (something I think was trained into her) I had known her long enough now to notice the slight twitch in the corner of her eyes that meant she was about to be a little mischievous. “Maybe I shouldn’t,” she said. “I’m curious to see if you could even handle yourself all on your own?”

“Oh, you know I can,” I said. “But there wouldn’t be as many survivors, so really you ought to come and help. Just think of the mess if I go in unsupervised.”

“If you know that you’re going to make a mess, then shouldn’t that encourage you not to?” she asked.

“No.”

Delilah’s look turned into a flat glare. She was good with those. “Fine. I suppose I can make the time to come with you.”

“Heh. Alright, thanks. I’ll be taking the Bastion over. I guess you’ll take the Fury?“

“That’d be sensible. Two vehicles is better than one. It’ll allow us more flexibility, as well,” she said with a little nod. “Are you going to contact our allies? Who were you thinking of bringing?”

“Eh, for now I’ll just send out a group message. I guess… Shy, Crackshot, Gros Baton… urgh, Princess, Hedgehog and Tankette. Grasshopper would be nice to have along. Emoscythe will know if I ask Crackshot. Am I forgetting anyone?”

“There are a few others. Sam-O-Ray operates around this region. Not necessarily in New Montreal all the time, but he’s often close by. Then there’s Cause Player as well. He does operate from New Montreal.” Delilah hummed. “We have… a lot of Samurai in this one city.”

“Do we?” I asked.

“Quebec had, at its recent height, five. We just listed off ten, not including the two of us, and I’m quite certain that there are a couple more. Jolly Monarch lives here, for example.”

“So, what, about fifteen-ish to their five?” I asked. “Isn’t our population three times larger? I’m not great at math, but that seems to work out.”

“Hm, I suppose it more or less does. Samurai-per-popula isn’t an exact science, in any case. I think the amount of Antithesis in a region counts for a lot, and then there are other factors, including the individual ‘taste’ of the various Protector AI.”

“What, you’re saying Myalis likes the flavour of me?” I asked.

Disgusting.

“I’m pretty sure you’re off on that one,” I agreed.

“Atyacus and I have a nice relationship,” Delilah said. “Anyway, add Cause Player and Sam-O-Ray to the people you’re contacting. They’ll be helpful to have as allies.”

“Yeah, yeah,” I said before stretching. I glanced at the time on my augs. It was just a few minutes shy of when Lucy would be coming home. I might as well be there for when she arrives. “I’ll do that right now, otherwise I’ll put it off and no one will wanna show up.”

She nodded. “Some people don’t appreciate tardiness.”

“The only people that do are the ones who are late,” I said. “Thanks for the coffee, it was… coffee-like? If you need anything, lemme know? Oh, and say hi to Franny when she shows up.”

“I can do that,” Delilah said. “She might be a little upset that you’re dragging me away from home.”

“Ah, yes, the honeymoon phase,” I said.

Delilah didn’t blush, because she wasn’t that sort, but I could still tell by the slight squeezing in of her shoulders that I’d gotten to her a little.

I got going, before she decided to toast me on the way out. I rode the elevator up, but stopped on the floor with the parking garage. Lucy hadn’t come back from school just yet, but I didn’t mind waiting for her. Though it was cold as balls.

Sure, the dolphin shorts were nice, but damn did they leave a lot of leg exposed, and in the nearly freezing garage I was starting to feel it. I walked over to the little pre-fab repair workstation I had in the back. The Nyanzeefaust was there, moved over from the Bastion after I’d brought it out to that casino. I had taken a few small bits apart to get back to fixing the internals properly. Maybe I should have done that today, instead of sitting on the couch upstairs and zoning out?

The author’s tale has been misappropriated; report any instances of this story on Amazon.

Eh, whatever. I half-heartedly fiddled with a few things, mostly just cleaning out a few parts and moving stuff around so that it was semi-organized. In the meantime… “Myalis, wanna help me write up an email?”

I can think of literally billions of things I’d rather do, but I suppose I can stoop so low as to be a secretary for you once more.

I rolled both eyes. “After that stunt with the call earlier, you’d better.”