Chapter Thirty-Nine – Where Things Go

Chapter Thirty-Nine – Where Things Go

“He that is without sin among you, let him yeet the first stone.
(John 8:3)”

–Excerpt from The New Youth Bible of 2044

***

“Do you want me to lay out the situation for you?” I asked as I helped Lucy to her feet. She paused, then stretched, and for a moment I was distracted by that little bit of belly that appeared when her shirt rode up.

“You make it sound serious,” she said.

“It sorta is,” I said. “We saved that girl, and uh, now she’s here. And she’s a bit of an orphan.”

Lucy turned and looked at me. “You’re so predictable.”

“What?” I asked.

She pulled me over, gave me an unfortunately chaste kiss, then used my shoulder as a place to rest her head while hugging me. “Predictable,” she muttered. “You saw the girl, felt bad about it, then decided she needed saving, right?”

“Well, I mean, at a certain angle you could certainly paint the situation to look like that,” I said.

She pinched my butt, or tried to. The armoured undersuit I was wearing made that a little hard. “Hmmph,” she said as she was robbed of one of her favourite past-times. “Well, whatever. We should have some funds, and as long as the girl doesn’t mind sleeping in the same room as the twins it should be okay.”

“Right, speaking of funds, I made lots of money.”

“Okay?”

“Like… multiple millions.”

Lucy pulled back and looked at me. “I guess that’ll help.”

“I thought you’d be more excited,” I said.

“Can we spend some of that on cute clothes?”

I rolled my eyes. “Yes Lucy, we can.”

“Good. The rest… I guess rent? We’ll need proper food too. I don’t know if we can stay in this much luxury forever.”

“We could,” I said. I’d find a way, if it’s what Lucy wanted.

“It’s just a bit much,” she said. “But whatever, it doesn’t matter. I’ll find some school stuff for the kittens soon, including the new girl, and… I guess we’ll see where things go from there?”

“Yeah, sure,” I said. “Maybe we can buy some other goodies? Or, uh, help people, somehow? Speaking of, I left Gomorrah in charge of the kittens.”

Lucy was confused for a moment, then I saw understanding flash in her eyes. “The nun?”

“The pyro nun, yeah,” I said.

“Cool! Let’s go say hi, and make sure the kids didn’t get themselves toasted.”

I was actually expecting… one of two things.

• Gomorrah buried under a pile of kittens, suffocating under their prying questions and being completely lost.

• One to ten dead kittens, and a faint odour of charred kids.

Instead I found the kids all sitting in the living room, with Gomorrah resting on the edge of one sofa and telling them all a story. They were being attentive, most sitting cross-legged on the floor and looking up to the samurai with wide eyes.

“Wow,” Lucy whispered.

“…And so on the sixth day, God created the heavens, the sun and the planets. He did this with his own will, and without assistance from any extra-terrestrial or intergalactic force.”

“When was that?” Bargain asked.

“That was many thousands of years ago,” Gomorrah said. She seemed happy, relaxed and quite content.

Bargain’s eyes narrowed. “Give me a thousand credits and I won’t discredit you in front of the others,” he said.

“I’ve literally seen her burn things alive,” I said. “I really wouldn’t fuck with her god-given patience. Anyway, Gomorrah, this is Lucy, my girlfriend. Lucy, this is Gomorrah, she’s a nun, a samurai, and, when she’s not being testy, she’s pretty fun. Also, she’s hot under the mask. Figuratively and literally.”

“How hot are we talking?” Lucy asked.

“I give her… point-eight Lucys.”

“I’m a measure for hotness now?” Lucy asked.

I nodded seriously. “When you’re in the room? Definitely.” This time, instead of a pinch, it was a smack. The armour did its job though, and Lucy shook her hand, looking mighty displeased.

“It’s a pleasure to meet you,” Gomorrah said as she stood. “Cat… hasn’t spoken too much about you, but what she said was always very fond. I can tell that she really cares for you, despite your non-standard relationship.”

Lucy and I looked at each other and we both decided not to poke at that. It was 2057, for fuck’s sake.

“Right,” I said. “So…” I looked over the kittens until I spotted Katallina standing a bit to the side of all of them. “Right, everyone’s met Katallina?” I asked.

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There was a lot of nodding.